Posted by: Caitlin | January 1, 2008

Razor, Razor, Razor…(Or, Happy New Year!)

Ah, it’s 2008! Hopefully most of you caught the ups and downs of the Winter Classic today on NBC (I have my criticisms and praises, but that’s neither here nor there and it is also another post for another time.)

As I ran today through my endless blog checking (I check literally about twenty blogs daily, most likely) I ran across Daryl “Razor” Reaugh‘s blog post entitled “What I Learned in 2007”.

Seriously, Razor? You learned something? First of all, a round of congratulations to you, as I believed you probably knew everything worth knowing, good sir.

Razor has some good points on his post, but there’s a couple of entries with which I have problems or on which I strongly agree.

  • “That the Stars could use a mascot.”

How wrong you are, Razor. There’s good mascots, and then there’s bad mascots. I give you Youppi, that horrid…thing that they parade around in Montreal:


This picture begs a few questions. Why is Youppi orange? Why won’t the Canadiens buy him new shoes? And most importantly, what is wrong with his face? Seriously, Razor, do you want this kind of monstrosity brought down on our team?

The answer to that is “no”, Razor.

Next point.

  • “That apple is a nice addition to smores.”

Razor, what is wrong with you? …I have no words.

  • “That ‘centergistic’ is my favorite word of 2007 (next to f#@*), and ‘silica based environmental interface’ is my most unnecessary phrase.”

Well, I’m glad you agree with me that ‘silica based environmental interface’ was the epitome of stupid, honey. Let’s all remember, however, that you were extraordinarily proud of yourself for coming up with that one when you did. You used it. Repeatedly. There was no need for this. I’ll never let you live it down.

Also, centergistic? Isn’t Ralphie supposed to put the brakes on your insanity at SOME point, Razor?

  • “That going to bed at 9:30 is so much better than sleeping till 11.”

You officially have no room to speak of Sergei Zubov’s “condition” (a nice way you and Ralph put the term “aging”) anymore, old man.

  • “That I’m more handsome on TV, and taller in person.”

1. No
2. No

Do you have a very deluded perception of yourself or what?

  • “That Kiehl’s soap products are the only way to keep a dirty boy like me clean.”

I’m so glad you chose not to elaborate further on this comment. From all of us at Untypical Girls to you, Razor, thanks.

  • “That tea bags aren’t always what you think they are.”

I have an idea of what you’re talking about here. Shut up, because I don’t want to know.

  • “That this Turco guy can excel in the pressured atmosphere of the S. Cup playoffs.”

One word: Duh.

  • “That I coin the best nicknames.”

No, you don’t. I do. I understand you fear the pain of losing, Razor. It’s why even when you lose on Open Net, you always win. The very thought of a loss eats at your very soul. Let’s just face facts, however. Until you come up with something like “Finnja”, I win in the nickname department. So really, it’s Caitlin 1, Razor 0.

Sorry. Maybe next year it’s your turn to win?

From me (Caitlin), to all of you out there, thanks for visiting. I checked the Google Analytics today; considering we’ve had visits from all over the globe, more than half of the U.S., a considerable amount from Canada and other far-off places, thanks for always reading us and checking back in.

Also, thank you to Marty Turco for making my night last night, when he appeared on the Big D NYE festivities drunk off his ass in front of everyone, giggling and swaying like a fool. Marty, I hope one of the other Untypical Girls TiVoed that shit, because it was awesome. After that game, you deserved to break into Russian’s Stolichnaya stash (and I’m sure he let you).

Happy 2008, everyone, and in honor of Razor, I say, “Wheeeeeee! Go Stars!”

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Responses

  1. No worries, I DVRed Marty. I didn’t notice that he was lit the first time, but now I’m noticing his slurring. I love you so much, Marty Turco.

  2. I DVRed Marty.

    Whew, thank god! You is best, Cat!

  3. I didn’t notice that he was lit the first time, but now I’m noticing his slurring.

    Doesn’t he always slur a little? :D

    Damn, I wish I had TiVo-ed that show.


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